Sorry it has been so long! This holiday season has really been rough. I think all the sugar and my schedule changing due to delays and snow has really messed with me. Hopefully it won’t happen again. 
Saturday is my long run day in my training plan for the Disney Princess Half Marathon at the end of February. All I had to do on Saturday was 4 miles which isn’t too bad. I’ve had trouble keeping up with the runs on weekdays because road conditions are NOT good at 5am in the morning (even to just drive to the gym). But I hoped on the treadmill on Saturday morning with T beside me and tried to give it my all.
Let me note that I am NOT a runner. I, in fact, do not even enjoy running. I enjoy finishing. Running is 90% mental and I struggle with that every time I run. Physically I can handle it but mentally I’m exhausted and ready to quit. T saw that I was struggling and got me to do 2 minute running intervals. It was so nice to have his support there.
During the second 2 minute run I convinced myself that I couldn’t focus on my face in the mirror and that I might pass out if I don’t get off. So I hit the emergency stop and got off the treadmill. T kept on and I headed to the hip abductor machine.
Before I knew it my eyes were watering and I was feeling like a failure. I had only gotten to 1.7 miles and it just wasn’t good enough for me. So I decided to step back on the treadmill. I was nervous that I wouldn’t feel good but the change in my mental state caused the run to go much better. I’m happy to say that I finished my 4 miles and it was ALL mental.
I figured out that I mentally defeat myself before I start running. I think that is why I do so much better in races. I cannot motivate myself to train but love the adrenaline of races.
My new training goal is to change my attitude. If I am determined to finish, 98% of the time I will (unless I get injured). I know that I can finish a half marathon. I’ve done it twice with no training whatsoever (dumb idea). Since Mom and I might stop and take pictures with some characters and will run the race just to run it together, I’m not worried about my time. My Mom is awesome and she can kick my butt when it comes to running. I don’t want to slow her down come February and I think once my attitude shifts, the physical aspect of running will follow suit.
Have you ever felt defeated before you even started something? How did you combat that?